


Robert's demons.

by Margorobron



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-21
Updated: 2016-11-21
Packaged: 2018-08-31 18:02:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,936
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8588329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Margorobron/pseuds/Margorobron
Summary: Robert is really distressed by Diane's comments on his mum's anniversary, but he finally manages to lay some demons to rest.





	

Aaron was the first through the door and headed straight to the kettle. Robert sat down on the sofa and picked up the remote. He began flicking through the channels absent mindedly, obviously having his mind elsewhere. Aaron watched him as he waited for the kettle to boil. Something was definitely not right here , but he wasn't sure what it was. He picked up two mugs of tea and headed for the sofa where he stood and watched Robert still scanning the channels.  
" What exactly are you looking for?"Aaron asked, causing Robert to look up at him vaguely.  
"Oh nothing"was the reply. " I hate daytime t.v.. I think I watched it too much when I was on my own at Vic's." He reached up for the mug of tea as Aaron sat down beside him.  
"So what's up?" Aaron asked looking for a response. The only change was the tightening of Robert's jaw, a sure sign that he was right.  
"Nothing's up" Robert said. "Why do you ask?"  
"You hardly said a word all the way home" Aaron pointed out.  
"Oh forgive me, Aaron, but you do know what day it is?"Robert snapped.  
"Of course I do, but there's something else. "Aaron said. " I know you're thinking about your mum."  
"Well there you are then!" Robert wrapped both hands around his mug and continued to drink his tea.  
"Well if there's something you wanted to talk about...." Aaron began.  
"Oh for God's sake!" Robert raised his voice.  
"Rob, I'm only trying to..."  
"Knock knock!" A female voice shouted from the door. "Can I come in?" Rebecca appeared. "Oh I hope I wasn't interrupting anything!" she added, looking at the two faces peering over the sofa at her.  
"When are you not!"Aaron muttered as Robert stood up.  
"Would you like a brew?" Robert asked and Rebecca giggled .  
"It does sound funny when you try to talk like the locals!" she said.  
"I am a local!" Robert replied. "I was born here! Now did you want that tea?"  
"Ooh snappy!" Rebecca commented." Well I suppose so, if there's nothing stronger on the menu!"  
"There isn't " said Robert, heading towards the kitchen.  
"You need to brush up on your people skills!" Rebecca commented. " You're losing your knack! Been living here too long!

Aaron turned and glared at her, but she was watching Robert making the tea.  
"Arent you having one?"Rebecca asked.  
"I've only just had one" Robert replied putting her mug on the table and pulling out a chair. Rebecca sat down and drew the mug towards her.  
Aaron really wanted to leave, as this woman made his skin crawl, but he wanted to keep a check on what was going on. Robert assured him it was strictly business with Rebecca but was he imagining those looks? He certainly didn't imagine him touching her hand. What sort of business could that be about?  
Rebecca started talking to Robert in a very quiet voice.

"Really?" Robert replied!" Well that's good news !"  
There was another hushed comment.

Aaron drummed his fingers on the arm of the sofa.  
"Ideal, but please don't get yourself alienated with them."  
Robert rested his hand over Rebecca's."All this effort you are making is really appreciated."Robert removed the hand and stood up.  
"Thanks for dropping by to tell me." he concluded.  
"Are you going to offer me that drink now?" she asked.  
"I did. You have it" Robert insisted.  
"I meant a proper drink!" she said, giving him a pleading look." Oh go on. You know you want to!" Robert walked to the door and held it open.  
"Wow you really have lost your touch!" she said, standing and grabbing her handbag roughly.  
As she reached Robert, she checked that Aaron was looking the other way and ran her fingers across Robert's cheek. He swiftly batted her hand away.  
"Don't "he said. She looked at him with big eyes. "Really!" he continued. "Don't push it! I'm not in the mood!"  
"Well I would say you definitely are in a mood!" Rebecca said sharply." I don't know why I bothered." Then as an afterthought, she shouted "Bye Aaron!"and flounced out the door.  
Robert gave the door a hefty push which closed it and he flopped down on the sofa.  
Aaron was glaring at him. He became aware of this a moment later and glared back at him.  
"And what's your problem?" he snapped.  
"My problem is that my fiance has been holding hands and staring into the eyes of his ex without even a thought to the fact I was sitting here!" Aaron explained , his voice raised.  
"So what's wrong with that? The mere fact that I knew you were sitting there must surely suggest that it meant nothing to me! I'm just keeping her sweet!" Robert said forcefully.  
"That's not how it looked from here!"Aaron insisted.  
"Oh for God's sake Aaron! Back off!" Robert shouted as he stood up and marched to the stairs.  
"Where are you going?"Aaron asked foolishly, knowing there weren't many choices. The bedroom door slammed.  
Aaron sighed. He decided to give him a few minutes before getting to the bottom of whatever was disturbing him.

Aaron opened the bedroom door quietly and went in. Robert was lying on the bed staring at the ceiling. There was a photograph beside him, turned over so that Aaron couldn't see who it was. He approached the bed and sat near the foot. Robert didn't move.  
"Now will you tell me what's going on?" Aaron asked "And before you once again tell me there's nothing, I'll just remind you that it didn't wash last time so even less chance this time. Please give me a little bit of credit!"  
Aaron fiddled with his ring as he waited patiently for some kind of reaction.  
Robert rubbed his eyes and put his hands back by his side, the right one landing on the photograph. He jumped having forgotten it was there, but didn't attempt to pick it up.  
"Can I see?" Aaron asked and Robert put his arm across his chest, leaving the photograph where it was. Aaron leaned over and picked it up. It was a photograph of Sarah, Robert's mother. Aaron hadn't been aware that Robert even had a picture of her. He studied it for a while.  
"The only person who accepted me for who I was. She loved me, I know she did, unconditionally. She never judged me. She didn't know about why the farm boy suddenly vanished, but if she had, she would have supported me, not condemned me forever to years of shame. Wouldn't she?"  
Robert looked at Aaron with eyes full of so many emotions.  
" Am I imagining that? Would she have despised me too? Would she have punished me? Have I got it all wrong? Have I spent all these years seeing her through the rose coloured spectacles Diane talks about? Would she really have been ashamed of who I've become?"  
Aaron stood up, the photograph still in his hand. He motioned to Robert to move up and he lay propped up on his side beside him.  
"Sarah is the person you believe her to be, Rob." Aaron began softly." You have kept her safe in your heart all these years. You know her better than anyone and definitely better than Diane." Robert closed his eyes as Aaron continued.  
" You know how much she loved you. You know she was there for you. You know she wouldn't have judged you. She would be proud of who you have become. You have come to terms with so many demons recently. You risked your life to save me and you even went back for that bastard Lachlan. You have lived with self hate all these years because of Jack's reaction and disappointment, but now you've put it behind you. You have always been there for Vic and you always will be. Now you are trying your best to clear Andy's name,so that he doesn't have to be a fugitive all his life like you were. I admit I'm not coping with way you're going about it with your ex, but that's my problem which I have to deal with, because you assure me there's nothing in it and you are using her, so I have to work on that. Sarah would be patting you on the back, Rob. Diane has got it all wrong."  
Robert looked at Aaron with tears in his eyes.  
"Do you really believe that Aaron?" he asked." You're not just saying it to make me feel better?"  
"Of course I'm not." Aaron said, leaning over to run his fingers playfully through Robert's hair." She was your mum. She would have been there for you, come what may. Believe in her, Rob, the way you have always believed in her. Don't doubt her now. Diane had no right to say that to you. It's lucky Vic wasn't there. She would've given her a mouthful I can tell you!"  
Aaron turned Robert's face towards him and Robert opened his eyes as Aaron drew his head to his chest and Robert's arm went round Aaron's waist. Aaron cradled Robert in his arms and Robert drank in the love and support Aaron was wrapping him in. 

 

The following morning found Robert in Hotten main street standing outside a church. This was not a place Robert had ever thought of going before.

He read the notices on the board outside.  
"Open circle, Saturday nights at 7pm.  
Service Sunday mornings at 11am. All welcome."  
This was Hotten Spiritualist Church. Robert had never before felt inclined to visit this church, but Diane's harsh words had hurt him more than he would ever admit to anyone, although he realized that Aaron had seen right through it. Something was telling him that he really should seriously consider coming here to see what it was like. People on the television were put in contact with their loved ones. Did this actually happen in real life? He didn't know, but he drove back home determined to return to this place on Saturday night.

 

Robert was quiet again that evening. Aaron was afraid that his words on the previous day had fallen on deaf ears. They sat together on the sofa cuddled up while Liv chuckled at one of her favourite cartoon series. When the programme ended, she looked at her two companions who had barely smiled at what she considered to be a hilarious half hour.  
"What's up with you two?" she asked as it ended." Was it really that boring? You usually at least manage a couple smiles!"  
"Take no notice, Liv" Aaron replied. "Robert is a bit thoughtful at the moment."  
"Why?What's up?" Liv asked showing concern.  
"Oh nothing to worry about" Aaron assured her.  
"It was your mum's anniversary yesterday, wasn't it."Liv said. "Vic told me."  
"Yes it was" Aaron said.  
"So is that why....."Aaron nodded. Liv gave a look of understanding. " Well if anyone wants me I'll be in my room." she said and left.  
"I thought maybe our chat yesterday had helped" Aaron said when Liv was safely out of the way.  
"What? Yes. It did."Robert said. He picked up Aaron's hand he had been holding and kissed it, smiling at him.  
"Could've fooled me!" Aaron said, smiling back.  
"Aaron, there's somewhere I want to go on Saturday night and I would really like you to come with me, but I don't think you will." Robert said.  
"Oh? You're not offering to take me to a new gay club are you?" Aaron laughed.  
"No,no, nothing like that!" Robert said.  
Aaron waited. "Well come on then. Where do you want to go?" he asked.  
Robert studied the two linked hands which were now on his knee.  
"I want to go to church." he announced, followed quickly by" it's not an ordinary church though. It's the spiritualist church in Hotten."  
"The spooky one? Oh my god Robert! Surely not!" Aaron sat upright on the edge the sofa. "Oh no! You're not getting me anywhere near there!"  
Robert's face fell, although it was what he had expected. "I can't even persuade you?" he asked.  
Aaron shuddered. "No way!" He said." Oh no!" He stood up." I'll make us a brew."  
"Not for me thanks!" Robert said and headed for the door. "I'll be back in a minute."  
Aaron stared after him, feeling guilty and yet determined not to be going anywhere near the creepy church!

Vic was busy chopping parsley in the Woolpack kitchen, when she looked up and saw her brother standing in front of her.  
"Robert!" she gasped."I didn't hear you come in!"  
"Sorry" Robert replied. "There's not really much point in knocking on the door. You wouldn't hear anyway."  
"This is very true" Vic agreed. "So, what can I do for you?"  
" A very big favour" Robert said.  
"Had to be for you to appear in here!" Vic replied. "Ok, what is it?"  
"I want to go somewhere on Saturday night and Aaron won't come with me, so I was sort of hoping I could persuade you to come" Robert told her.

"Where do you want to go?" Vic asked him.  
"I er have had big issues with something Diane said to me in the cemetery yesterday."Robert began." She told me how disappointed mum would have been in how I've turned out."  
"What??" Vic screeched."How dare she! She didn't really know mum so how would she know that? She never discussed you with her! It's a good job I wasn't there!"  
"That's what Aaron said!"Robert agreed."But it started me thinking. You know on the telly they have that Colin chap and Sally someone."  
"Who? Oh. Are you talking about mediums?" Vic asked.  
"I like watching them. Some of the things they come out with. Do you think it's real or is it a fix?"  
"I don't know"Robert said,"but I would like to think it were true."  
"Well you can't just go and see them. That's just on t.v."Vic pointed out.  
"Yes, but there's a spiritualist church in Hotten. They have meetings on Saturday nights." Robert told her.  
"And you want to go."Vic said.  
Robert looked at her hopefully.  
"Well I can see why Aaron won't go. He would be bricking it!" Vic replied. Robert nodded. "You want to go this Saturday?" Another hopeful nod." Well I'm not working this Saturday, so I don't see why not"  
Robert could hardly believe his luck. " What, you'll come with me?" he asked,his eyes gleaming.  
"Yes I will, BUT..You mustn't get your hopes up. She may not come through."  
"Vic, you're an angel! Love you to bits!" Robert said, hugging Vic and kissing her cheek. " Thank you so much!"  
Robert left. Vic sighed, smiling to herself and returned  
to her parsley.

Aaron was sitting at the table sipping his tea when Robert burst in. He looked,up, surprised.  
"Wow!" he said. "That's a definite turn around if ever I saw one. Where have you been?"  
"Vic's going to come with me to the church!" Robert beamed, throwing his arms round Aaron's shoulders and kissing his cheek."I'll have that brew now. Do you want another?"

 

Saturday evening found three wary characters approaching Hotten Spiritualist Church. Aaron, all of a dither, had agreed to accompany Robert after all and was following him and Vic up the steps.  
They were greeted by two cheery ladies who were taking money and selling raffle tickets. Robert sorted this and then followed the lady's instructions to sit anywhere within the circle of chairs. There were a few people already seated and they smiled as they found,somewhere to sit. Aaron decided they must have been here before as their hands didn't seem to be shaking like his. Robert was chatting quietly to Vic who was reminding him once again not to get his hopes up for a message from their mum. Robert heard her words, but he felt that his mum must know how desperately he needed that message, if indeed there was any truth in this communication.  
At 7pm, with the circle almost full of people of various shapes and ages, the ladies who had been sitting by the entrance joined the circle and the taller lady with short white curly hair welcomed everyone to the church. She began with the raffle, resulting in Robert winning a box of chocolates which he presented to his sister and then the lady shared a few pointers of what to expect from the evening.  
The lady to her left then stood up and started to speak to the man three seats away from Aaron. As she said, " Can I speak to you please," Aaron's heart leapt into his mouth thinking she was talking to him and he grabbed Robert's hand. The man understood everything the lady shared with him and recognised that the information was coming from his brother who was in Spirit. He was thrilled with what the lady shared with him.  
When the next medium stood up, she addressed a lady on the other side of the room, who was very moved by what she was told and a box of tissues was passed to her. She again despite her sobs was very glad to have been give the evidence that her partner was alive and well in the world of Spirit.  
Next a man stood up. "Could I come to you, please sir?" he said walking towards Robert. Now it was Robert's turn to squeeze Aaron's hand, as Vic grabbed his hand on the other side.  
"Theres a lady standing behind you."he began. "In fact she is standing between you and the young lady, so I'm thinking you are together. She is medium build and medium height with dark curly hair and she has a huge smile on her face. She has put a hand on each of your shoulders now" the medium shared. "She is really pleased that you have come here this evening."he continued. " She has come here for a special reason tonight because I feel it has been someone's birthday, please. Can you take that?"  
"It was her birthday a few days ago" Robert said quietly, clearing his throat.  
"And she's here on a mother vibration. Is that right please?" he asked. Robert nodded.  
"Well, she says she is really pleased you are here because she wants to tell you how proud she is of you ." The medium continued."She says life hasn't been easy for you. You had years of sort of wandering in the wilderness, away from your family and having to rebuild a life from nothing. This was very hard for you. But then a change in circumstances brought you back to your roots and now you can hold your head up high. You have achieved many of your goals and she is really proud of that. She is especially pleased that you are ready to settle down with someone who is a very stable influence on you." He looked at Aaron, who resembled a rabbit in the headlights. "She is including you here too, sir."he said to him.,Aaron raised his eyebrows. " She says there's a big event being planned and she will definitely be there." Robert and Aaron looked at each other. "She is also saying that someone is missing from the family at the moment. She is saying he is safe,so don't worry about him. He is calming down and beginning to get used to his new situation. She's also saying that you must not let negative thoughts take over. I think this is to do with the missing person. She is saying you must not take risks. Let things take their course. What goes around,comes around, she is saying." The medium turned to Vic. "And she wants to say to you, how extremely proud she is of you. She's showing me an ice cream van. Does that mean anything to you?"  
Vic gasped and looked at the boys.  
"Yes it does."Vic replied.  
"She says this memory is really important for you, but this isn't just in the past. It's still important for your future. Do you understand that please?"  
"Yes I do!" Vic said.  
"Well I'm glad you do!"said the medium." I've never seen anyone get so excited about an ice cream van!" Vic laughed as tears began to fall.," She is also saying that there is something really special coming up for you. This will be happening in the summer so watch out for that." Vic nodded , taking out a tissue  
"And before I leave you, I must come back to you, sir." the medium said, standing in front of Robert." The lady is moving back and there's a man standing with her wearing a flat cap. He wants to tell you he is so sorry. He put you through so many things and none of it was your fault. He just couldn't cope with them at the time. He says he loves you very much and he is very proud of who you have become. He says you are the son he always wanted but he wasn't good at showing it." Robert began to shake as Aaron put his arm round him.  
" I will leave the three of you with lots of love from your family in the spirit world and thank you for sharing them with me" The medium went back to his chair and the evening continued, whilst Robert leaned forward, his face in his hands, two arms round him, both also sobbing softly.  
By the end of the evening, the trio had recovered and stayed to have a cup of tea. Friendly people chatted with them and then the medium who had spoken to them came over. Immediately Robert began to well up again and tried to thank the man, telling him how much the words had meant to him. The medium smiled and said how glad he was that he had been able to bring the family members through to them. He patted Robert's arm and thanked the three of them for coming, saying they were welcome to return any time they liked and he went off to fetch himself a cup of tea.  
There was so much to be shared in the car on the way home. They stopped to take Vic home and Adam came out to the door to greet them. Vic immediately burst into tears and hugged him. Adam frowned and looked anxiously towards those in the car,, who smiled assuring him that she was fine and would explain everything to him.  
Robert and Aaron cuddled up on the sofa with another mug of tea.  
"I'm so glad I came with you "Aaron said. "I wouldn't have missed that for the world! You see, Diane was completely wrong, although your mum did say you need to leave the Whites alone and what about your dad,eh?" Robert immediately burst into tears again and held on tightly to Aaron.  
"Come on. Enough of today. Let's go to bed!" he said.  
A tearful Robert nodded. They both stood up and Aaron reached for his hand.  
"Aaron, I know it was a big deal you coming with me tonight. I can't thank you enough for being there for me."  
"I'll always be there for you, mate. You know that. And it seems like your mum's got a new hat ready so I think it's time we started making some plans!"


End file.
